Friday, July 12, 2013

Broken road

I set out on a narrow way, many years ago
hoping I would find true love along the broken road.
But I got lost a time a or two. 
wiped my brow and kept pushing through 
I couldn't see how every sign pointed straight to you 

I have always loved this Song. It's called the broken Road by Rascal Flats. The first time I remember hearing it the song brought tears to my eyes. Alex was just a baby, and the awesomeness of caring for another human being was catching up with me. Things were hard and I'd been struggling with school, work, money, friends.... everything and this song made me stop and think.... it's all worth it... all the "stuff" that I've been through and I am going through is worth it.... it's all going to be worth it. I have Alex. 



Every long lost dream led me to where you are

                                                     Others who broke my heart they were like Northern stars

Pointing me on my way into your loving arms

This much I know is true



That God blessed the broken road

That led me straight to you


I spent the better part of my late teens and early twenties a drift.... no real plan or purpose. I switched from job to job, followed a boyfriend across the country because he had a plan & I didn't.... It seemed like all my friends, and my siblings, knew exactly what they wanted and how to get it.  They got degrees, jobs, engaged, took vacations... and I was just floating where ever the breeze took me. Don't get me wrong, I had fun too! Having no real responsibilities, no real plans can be liberating at times. Staying up late, going out dancing, meeting new people, learning new cities, buying that outfit just cause it makes your butt look good!!! . there are days that I long for that carefree life...
There are days that if I have to wash ONE more load of laundry, make one more peanut butter and Nutella, hear the kids argue one more time about who's turn it is, get one more bill....I think I am going to explode..... I want to go back to AZ and float down the Salt river in an inner tube. I want to dance down at Navy Pier to an old Jazz band, to be free..... to be a drift.....


I think about the years I spent just passing through.
 I'd like to have the time I lost and give it back to you. 
But you just smile and take my hand you've been there you understand. 
It's all part of a grander plan that is coming true...

But then I remember.... oh how AWFUL it was to not know what to do with myself. The nights I'd cry myself to sleep because I had no idea who I was or what I wanted,  the boys I'd try hopelessly to find myself in, and I realize that all of THAT led me to now. I have three kids that are smart, funny, healthy and they love me & trust me completely. I have a husband... who is funny, and smart, hard working, honest, and who knows me better than anyone in the world and still wants me to be his. I'm finally getting my degree doing something that I was always meant to do.... I have friends, true, honest, reliable, hilarious friends... I found my northern star..... the path was always leading to this... I just didn't know it....


Pointing me on my way into your loving arms,
 this much I know is true. 
That god blessed the broken road that led me straight to you 

Tuesday, July 2, 2013

A decade ago...

The year is 2003 
          The #1 song is Crazy in Love by Beyonce  

          The movie Finding Nemo hits theaters


          Lance Armstrong wins his 5th tour de France
          Americans try to rename French Fries to "freedom Fries"
          Arnold Schwarznegger is elected Governor of California. 
          Theo Schmidt & Cathie Tierney go on their first date. 

That's right boys and girls Theo and I have survived TEN years together!!! While neither of us can remember the EXACT date we met, I can tell you our first date was July 10th. We met for dinner at the Martini's up by Polaris Mall. I arrived early and worked out a code with the waitress that if I ordered an APPLE martini that was code for You have a fake phone call at the bar for me that I can use as an excuse to leave! I know it's crazy but I was SO nervous, every guy I'd EVER dated I had been friends with first. Meeting a guy for dinner that I'd only met ONCE was a bit nerve racking for me and I wanted to find a way to gracefully exit if I needed to! The waitress was awesome and even told us there was a happy hour special on Apple Martini's after he arrived. Luckily I didn't have to order one that night, and 10 years later I've STILL never had an APPLE martini!! (I'm afraid it'll be bad luck or something!) 

Its hard to remember what my life was like 10 years ago, I was working Full time, going to school full time and trying to keep up with Alex. I know I was busy and a little stressed, but I remember being happy. I wasn't really looking for a relationship at the time because I couldn't imagine having time for one, but when I met Theo I remember thinking that he was just as busy as I was. Over the summer we managed to see each other off and on and in the fall he went on a trip with his Dad out to AZ. I didn't expect to hear from him while he was gone but one night the phone rang and it was him. I remember being so surprised and at the same time relieved that he had called. After that trip we were together... a couple.... boyfriend/girlfriend.... only neither of said it... we didn't have a "TALK" about it.... it was just the way it was. 

Now it's 2013 and Theo and I are married with 3 kids, a 3 bedroom house and a minivan in the driveway.... We've survived both of us getting college degree's, supported each other through the loss of loved one's, teething babies & potty training, house repairs, and road trips. We've laughed about living the dream, and stay at home parents ground hog-esq days. It's been FAR from a fairy tale romance, but I can't imagine what life would be like NOW if I'd ordered that Apple Martini THEN!!! 

A little old lady once told me, "marry someone that you can have fun folding the laundry with!" I thought she was a bit nutty at the time, but I now I think I know what she meant! Being a grownup/parent is always the most fun... It is hard & exhausting, and having someone that you sincerely enjoy being around makes all the difference in the world! It's hard to imagine what life will be like in another 10 years... Alex will be 22, Leah 18 and Ethan will be 16 years old, YIKES  I don't like the sound of that!!! I want my kids to stay little....I don't want them to be grownups so soon! 10 years sounds like so much time but geeze the last 10 have gone by so quickly!!! 

I have no idea what the next decade has in store for us, but hopefully Theo will still be by my side making me laugh while we fold our 5 millionth load of laundry!!! I love you babe!